Monday, August 1, 2011

Primal Scream Therapy

I spent most of yesterday pissed off and by the time I was sitting in the driveway at home I was still boiling mad. So, Lydia – Red – and I had a little heart-to-heart.

Red: Wow, you look like hell!

Kathy: (glancing in the rear view mirror) That’s what high blood pressure all day will do to you!

Red: You wouldn’t look like that if you had used Primal Scream Therapy on the way home. As a matter of fact, you’d be quite chilled out. Maybe ready for a nap. Better company anyway.

Kathy: (chuckling) Seriously? So, how does it work?

Red: Easy enough – you just scream your guts out at the top of your lungs where no one can hear you. Your car is perfect…except when you’re stopped at a light.

Kathy: Really? What does that do for you, besides making everyone think you’re a crazy person?

Red: All the tension goes away. Try it right now.

I took her up on it and started the car. By the time I was rolling down the boulevard towards Mickey D’s I was yelling my head off – a high, piercing sound. I glanced around self-consciously. No one appeared to notice. Of course, there wasn’t a car closer than 10 yards anyway.

Red: Feel better now?

Kathy: Yeah…strangely, I do. Much better. What’s it called again?

Red: Primal Scream Therapy. I used to do it pretty regularly when Mac was still around. You know how men can drive you crazy sometimes!

Kathy: I remember. It’s been a while, but I do still remember. (laughing)

Red: What made you that mad anyway?

Kathy: Let’s see – people who have to be right at all costs, liars, mean people, people who get off on pissing other people off.

Red: Geez, you really ran into a bad bunch of people today, didn’t you?

Kathy: Nope, just one. She happened to have all those traits. I think I’ll take the long way to Mickey’s and scream a little more.

Red covers her imaginary ears and I scream myself hoarse. Feels so bad it feels good. Tomorrow will be much better, I think.

Buy “Red Mojo Mama” here!


  1. I've found scream therapy to be effective when done about 6" away from the face of the person who tipped you over. Of course, they will stop following you on Twitter and unfriend you on Facebook but then....
    Thanks for sharing scream therapy -

  2. Or maybe they quite going to lunch with you. Oh, wait...that's not necessarily a BAD thing.

  3. Never do that in Church! Or near a cop car. Ot in the woods where tigers live. Other than that it's a great method. Hall's always helps my sore throat.
    Great post, Kathy.

  4. I really need to try this. On the plus side, I will lose my voice if I do so I can get out of having to talk to people who make me angry.

  5. I had an essay in Family Fun magazine about ten years ago that described how my sons and I used to have screaming contests on days when I was stressed out and they were being hyper. Love screaming...